POS: What kind of activities does FMSF hold? Tell us about the travel aspect built into it.
TH: For My Sister Friends, LLC strives to encourage women to live a happier, healthy and more harmonious life by participating in monthly sister friend chats, workshops, and charitable events. These activities will assist in cultivating a transformation in the lives of the women we serve. To promote living healthier, we have organized Zumba in the Park as well as participated in AIDS Walk New York and Race for the Cure Walk. To promote living happier, as a group we attend plays, enjoy brunches, come together for “Cocktails and Chat” and many other activities that bring joy and laughter in our midst.
When I think about my passion for seeing women live more harmonious, it takes me back to our first annual retreat in beautiful Montego Bay, Jamaica. The Remembering Me Retreat is designed for women who are working towards creating more peace in their life by obtaining the tools to love themselves more. There is something about the tranquil Caribbean waters that transitions you to a space of peace and harmony. Each day opened with a guided meditation that evolved into discussions that allowed the attendees to release negativity to open our spirit to positivity; relate as we connected with our inner self; relax and enjoy the tranquility of the island; and rejuvenate to get back to the woman who has lain dormant. One of our guests said this about the retreat, “When I arrived in Jamaica I was one way. When I left I felt like a totally different person. I am so at peace with myself and I am so in love with me.” It is this type of feedback that reinforces the work I do to inspire women.
POS: What is one of the greatest challenges associated with being a life coach? Do you find it difficult at times to get people to open up to you?
TH: One of the greatest challenges associated with being a life coach is trying not to take on my clients’ stuff. When I say stuff, I mean some of the challenges they present to me. I am a nurturer and when my sister friends hurt I often feel it. That’s when I transition into to mother, sister, and friend and try to provide solutions to the problem. My goal is not to fix anyone because I do not consider them broken. My goal is to provide them with the tools to make the changes they desire. In the end, my clients are able to stand on their own and only have a need to check in with me to share the great transformations that they have completed using the tools I have provided.
To be perfectly honest, I do not find it difficult to people to open up to me. I am a good listener and I hear what is said be it verbally or non-verbally. When I interpret to the client what I hear them saying, the conversation begins to flow. Often I become amazed by how forthcoming the women are when sharing with me. Perhaps it is the calm environment that I create or whatever they are feeling has been festering for a period of time waiting for the right opportunity to be released. I have actually given up trying to figure out what makes them share. The important thing is that they are sharing; perhaps because they want to heal and move past their current circumstances.
POS: How do you strike a balance between your full time job, family, with these very involving pursuits?
TH: This is a funny question because if you were to ask anyone who really knows me, they will tell you that I am extremely organized. Ever since I can remember, I’ve always had a place for everything; arrive a few minutes ahead of time for an event, or appointment.
But here is how I am able to make the balancing act work for me. My full time job (gosh I dislike that word because it’s not a job, I love what I do) affords me the opportunity to leave my administrative duties in office at the conclusion of the workday. Using a great calendar system, I block time to work on projects, attend social events, and make time for myself and loved ones. After all of these are accounted for, there is a specific amount of time that is allotted for individual coaching sessions. And somehow, I am still able to squeeze in a vacation or two. In a nutshell balancing comes easy for me.
The key is planning instead of allowing everything to be last minute.
POS: How have some of your clients been able to transform their lives? Give us one example.
TH: One of the challenges that some of the women I coach are experiencing pertains to employment. Either the women are having challenges in their current role or they are finding it difficult to obtain employment. However, I provide them with resources, coupled with a lot of tough love, that allows them to either start their own business, transition into a career that they never thought about but possessed the skills to perform, or identify ways to enhance their skills in their current roles. One client who resides in the Caribbean says it best, “Tina I always remember you scolding me and even thought I was kind of mad at you. But I sucked it up like a big girl and saw the turn-around. It wasn’t easy but it works. When you adjust your attitude anything can happen. I was nominated employee of the month, which gives me the opportunity to also be a candidate for employee of the year. The only word to express my feeling is GRATEFUL.”